Have you ever felt unworthy? It didn’t matter what you did, you couldn’t get rid of the negative self-talk that prevents you from chasing your dreams.
Nagging doubt about your abilities may cause you to suffer from imposter syndrome. It’s not easy to get out of that mindset, but millions of people have done it, and you can too. Beginning with a clear vision of your goals, letting go of the perfectionism that is holding you back, is the first step.
SUCCESS People editor Tristan Ahumada talks to Lisa Bilyeu, co-founder of Quest Nutrition and host of Women of Impact, about overcoming self-doubt in this episode of Brilliant Thoughts.
They sold Quest Nutrition for $1 billion to her and her husband. In order to do so, Bilyeu had to overcome her self-doubt and find her purpose.
When you become the hero of your own life, you will achieve success in your endeavors. Because she believes in it, she took three steps to make it a reality.
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Assume That You Are The Best Version Of Yourself Possible
It all begins with asking yourself: Who am I at my best and most powerful? You can’t use someone else as a reference point, so it’s a tricky question. For example, it isn’t as simple as saying, “I want to be just like my mentor or a Forbes 30 Under 30 entrepreneur.”
Enhancing one’s quality of life is a deeply personal endeavor. Even the tiniest change should be deliberate enough to move you in the direction you desire.
Try to learn from others’ successes instead of trying to copy them. What motivates them to keep moving forward? Do they have a higher level of discipline than most people?
Write down your superpowers, whatever they are. It’s a good idea to keep the list handy so you can work on adopting those traits each day.
Keep yourself patient in the meantime. All the changes you must make can take years to figure out and master. Any failure – and they will happen – isn’t the end of the world. Those mistakes can still be corrected and you can improve each day.
You don’t just wake up one day and decide to be a nicer person, says Bilyeu. “It takes a lot of time, effort, and energy to become that.”
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Quit Trying To Be Perfect And Just Be Yourself Instead
You may be surprised to learn that perfectionism has more to do with ego than a desire for perfection. Most people are aware of the fact that life has its faults.
Ego, on the other hand, has an agenda of its own and tries to convince us that it isn’t. As a result, we begin to believe that if we work hard enough, everything will be perfect.
With this mindset, it’s impossible to grow, especially when you’re dealing with self-doubt. What’s the good news, you ask? According to Bilyeu, you can defeat perfectionism by being flexible. Her rigid, unproductive thoughts disappear when she reframes a difficult situation.
To the point where, in real-time, I can ask myself, “How should I respond to this based on the person I want to be?” According to Bilyeu,
“I found being in those meetings extremely detrimental to my self-esteem…. You’re in a room full of people, and you have no idea what they’re talking about, and I felt bad about myself,” Bilyeu says. “Then I said, ‘Ok, you have a choice.
You can keep coming into this room feeling bad about yourself, you can stop coming into this room or you can admit that they’ve got 15 years on you, and now you can start putting your head down and learning instead of focusing on the emotion you feel badly about.’”
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To get there, follow these four steps:
- Make yourself at ease with being uncomfortable. Getting out of your comfort zone is the only way to grow.
- Embrace a growth mindset. Embrace the fact that you don’t know everything. Ask questions if you feel like an imposter in a room of experts. Don’t be afraid to let yourself grow.
- Don’t put a time limit on your progress. No deadline is necessary for becoming the best version of yourself. The journey, not the destination, is what counts.
Be Aware Of Your Feelings.
Try to regulate your emotions before you get stuck in self-doubt. It was a constant question for Bilyeu when she began helping her husband with Quest Nutrition. As a result, she often had to speak up in meetings, even when she was terrified.
In order to regulate your emotions, you must also take care of yourself. It doesn’t matter how busy you are as an entrepreneur as long as you eat well and exercise regularly.
When you’re tired or hungry, it’s hard to make good decisions, so creating healthy routines is essential. Morning weightlifting is a favorite pastime for Bilyeu, after a good night’s rest. She also pays attention to how certain foods affect her body.
However, everyone has different needs. To have an emotionally successful day, stay in control, and slowly overcome the self-doubt that’s holding you back, get to know your body.