All of our endeavours, whether they are public speeches or birthday parties for children, are geared towards success. And no matter how much success we hope to achieve, we will almost certainly have to overcome obstacles along the way. Our options, when faced with these obstacles, are either to run away and miss our chance or to meet them prepared and informed.
Obstacles can make us feel as if the outside world is conspiring against us, but in reality, they are merely triggering internal obstacles. We may be slowed down by memories or beliefs about ourselves. It is possible to fall into the trap of self-sabotage.
What would happen if you were aware of these obstacles and prepared for them in advance of their occurrence?
You might be able to overcome any obstacle if you were aware of what you were up against. Perhaps you could turn a mountainous obstacle into a molehill in a matter of seconds!
In order to achieve success, you must overcome the following eight obstacles:
1. Perfection
The need for perfection is one of the most common roadblocks we run into. It was something her mother used to tell her, according to Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear. Every single thing must always be “just so” for someone who is prone to perfectionism.
Creativity, vitality, and accidental discoveries are all killed by perfectionism!
So many things that we use every day are discovered by accident. As a result, their “mistakes” may not have been as successful as they could have been. Plus, we develop and grow throughout our lives by learning from our mistakes. Because of this, “perfection” will never be a surefire path to success.
How are you going to stop striving for excellence? Like years of practice to “perfect” a skill you’ve acquired, it takes practise to undo perfectionism as well.
Try the following:
Let go of your expectations and try new things!
- Don’t try to accomplish everything on your “To-Do” list at the same time. See what happens if you put it off until tomorrow. -(No, not everything is equally important at all times).
- A typo in an email is a great way to show off your rebellious side.Learn to laugh at yourself. As a human, you have entered a world of wonder and excitement.
2. Lack of Clarity
Take a trip and pack accordingly. Despite the fact that your suitcase is out, you have no idea where you’re going. It is unclear where you will be going, how long you will be gone, or what you will be doing while on your travels at this time. For this trip, how easy or difficult will it be to pack?
Trying to run our careers or lives without clarity can make it nearly impossible to figure out what we need to do to reach our success goals. We need clarity, but how do we get it?
About an area of life can benefit from the advice of Simon Sinek, a best-selling author and motivational speaker. WHY is the first thing Sinek says you should consider when defining your “message.” [2] Why are you doing what you are doing? Having a clear understanding of your “why” will make figuring out what you’re going to do next much easier.
3. Fear
Whenever we think or feel unsafe, we experience fear. When there is a real threat to our safety, this is a very helpful tool. Fear, on the other hand, can prevent us from doing the work necessary to achieve our goals when the threat is fictitious.
Being more mindful is the best way to deal with fear, just as it is with perfectionism.
Here are some steps you can try in working through fear:
- Watch your body as it reacts to the emotion of fear. The thoughts that accompany the feeling should also be taken into consideration
- Write down your fears.
- Visualize yourself going through your worst fears and experiencing them first-hand. Your worst fears coming true, how did you feel?
- When have you felt this way in the past? As a result, how did you handle it at the time? Could you have made better use of any of your strengths in your previous visualisation?
Visualize yourself facing your worst fear with all your strength. Does it help to know that you have the tools and resources to deal with whatever comes your way?
As part of this exercise, we’re working on accepting fear. “Safety” is what fear is trying to accomplish. Suddenly, you’re reminded of a time when you were in danger. The fear grows stronger when we spend all of our energy trying to prevent it. Our memories of the times when we overcame our fears and triumphed are also obliterated.
As Franklin Roosevelt said, “the only thing to fear is fear itself” by allowing it to be present and recalling times when we overcame challenges.
4. Untamed Inner Monologue
Positive self-talk, according to Mayo Clinic, is beneficial to our health. [4] Compassionate inner voice has been shown to reduce depression, improve immune function, and improve coping skills in stressful situations.
There are several activities that you can do to become more aware of your inner monologue and to make it more compassionate:
Thought journaling (there are so many great apps for this!
Neutralizing or compassionately rephrasing negative self-statements.
You could also ask yourself what a trusted friend would tell you.
If you were in a friend’s shoes, what advice would you give them?
EFT is an option to consider. Invoking affirmations by tapping on the table or by saying them aloud.
Affirmation: Allowing yourself to be guided by your inner critic’s worst-case scenario.
5. Making Comparisons
As human beings, we are prone to comparing ourselves with others. The only way to tell if something is going well or not is to measure it. Comparing ourselves constantly and feeling bad about not being able to “keep up with the Joneses” can drain our energy. Also, when we lose our energy, we lose the motivation to keep working toward our goals. –
As with perfection, it’s important to be cognizant of how much importance you place on “keeping up” with what you believe everyone else is doing in your environment.
Trying to stop comparing yourself to others? We can help! Try these suggestions:
When you compare yourself to someone else, pay attention to the emotions that arise.
Why is this comparison so useful to me, and what information am I really gaining?
Let go of the rest of this line of questioning and keep the parts that are helpful.
Never forget to look at your own potential when comparing yourself to someone else.
6. Unreasonable Expectations
It’s important to have big aspirations in life. As a result, inspiration in life and big ideas can come into our awareness more easily. The problem is that if our dreams are not grounded in reality, we may be in for disappointments or even worse: we may lose our dreams!
In order to be successful, you must have realistic expectations. Set SMART goals if you haven’t already.
Particularly if you’re trying out a brand-new project, it may not always be possible to tell whether something is reasonable. If a new project is expected to run smoothly, this is likely to be unreasonable. Having this experience could cause you to lose your desire to succeed.
As long as bumps and glitches are expected as part of a new project, even perceived “mistakes” will prove to be a success. If you’re successful, it’ll fuel your motivation and encourage you to keep working for more.
Be mindful of where you set the bar—neither too high nor too low.
7. Unclear Boundaries
Keeping a journal of your thoughts (there are so many great apps for this!
Neutralizing or compassionately rephrasing negative self-statements.
A trusted friend might tell you something.
If you were in a friend’s shoes, what would you say to them?
EFT is an option to consider. Affirmations can be expressed by tapping or saying them.
Affirmation: Allowing yourself to be guided by your inner critic’s worst-case scenario.
Several ways that internal boundaries are necessary for success have been discussed so far. For example, you may not be able to control your fear or limit your need for perfection. You may also lack clarity about what you want, make unhealthy comparisons to others, or have a mean-spirited inner monologue.
Are there others with whom we need to establish boundaries? Distinguishing yourself from other people is not the goal of setting boundaries. Communicating what you want, how you want to be treated, and your plans are essential to maintaining healthy external boundaries with others.
Here are a few steps:
In the absence of clear boundaries with others, success will only come by chance.
Empaths and people pleasers know how difficult it is to set boundaries with others. As a result of their desire for harmony, some people believe it is easier to let others make the decisions rather than risk conflict.
However hard we try to avoid conflict with others, we will always create conflict within ourselves, causing roadblocks to success along the way. This is a skill that takes time to develop.
Make a list of the little things that you enjoy and enjoy having.
People want to know what you like and what you want out of life.
Watch your body’s reaction to saying this out loud.
Identify the things you don’t like or want to have in your life and why.
Take note of how your body reacts to these thoughts. This is a great example of your body telling you what it doesn’t want!
Tell people you trust what you don’t like or what you’d like.
Become aware of how it makes you feel to say this out loud in your body.
Working up to bigger things, start out by saying “no” to something really small.
It’s like trying to hold a shape as water without a container. Create your own success container and watch it come to life.
8. Unreasonable Definition of Success
When it comes to success, how would you define it? From what angle do you view success?
Many people believe that success is defined by achieving the goals they set for themselves. But success can be viewed from so many different angles. Maybe you’re missing out on some opportunities to shine in your life.
Unreasonable success could be defined as only allowing one outcome. Achieving that outcome is essential to achieving success. Achieving success could be easier if we allow for multiple definitions of the term.
What is success to you?
Is there anything I need to do for me to feel successful?
Other than that, what else could I do to feel successful?
Create a sense of success by brainstorming all the possible outcomes.